Who's zoomin who?

So your in secondlife, and you want a tiny baby unicorn? No problem. They are free to all, as long as you don't mind getting totally boned by a horned wonder horse. Apparently, the unicorn doesn't shoot a full load every time, and it may take multiple times of getting your swerve on with the unicorn to get the baby unicorn. But if you get bored trying, Sensual Statues has several different things that would be more then happen to grab and rape your avatar while you wait.

ASDFQWERTy I can't think of a post title.

OK. So I set up a etsy shop last night, to maybe sell a few of my pictures I have taken, or some other odds and ends. I also have up there a couple geeky gamer things my sister has made, so please check out her Super Mario and World of Warcraft bead art, and maybe buy one or two.

So, here is how this next part is going to work. I made two youtube playlists, one is of summery summer music, and the other is funny summery activities. You can enjoy this any of three ways:

1. Watch the funny summery videos, then watch the summery summer music.

2. Press play on the summery summer music, and then turn the volume down on the funny summery videos

3. Don't watch either, and let me know to stop wasting time making these playlists and post more furry porn.

4. Play the music, while enjoying the rest of the post

And here are the Summery funny videos!

So universally Bioshock is hitting to rave reviews (minus the fucking secure-rom bullshit that they will eventually have to take out, and a few other launch bugs). Pretty much anyone who plays it realizes that it is a fucking gaming masterpiece.

So what do you think is going to be the response when you totally pan the game in a three paragraph review on your Sony fanboy site. Enjoy your bleeding ass. (click that second link folks, its still one of my favorite older school internet reads.)

Thank god our gov't is still doing things to protect us on some fronts. See The Ocular Penetration Bill Of 2007 Also from the ONN, The new gap kids, made by kids for kids line seems to be a huge hit!

Man, this is far superior to the lame little bunny foofoo shadow puppet I whip out for my kids from time to time.

ATHF Zombie Ninja Pro-Am Trailer I don't think I have ever seen a game title that more sums up what a game is all about. But they leave out that it also involves mini-golf. This game is going to be the best kart racing/fighting/golf game ever created. And in case you hadn't seen it yet, the intro the the ATHF movie is fucking genius.

Do you have several hundred old processors just laying around? Craft that shit up motherfucker!

I would have never thought of stacking dice as something even remotely entertaining, thank you interwebtubes. Man, some of these videos are pretty crazy.

I found the site Pirate Rehab a few months back, and its been a great place to find awesome freeware to replace things I maybe would have gotten previously in not so ok ways.

Anyways. Time for me to turn in for the night, I've been switching between this post, and trying to fix some dhcp errors on one of my servers at werk, so this post was a little bit shorter then I wanted it to be.. but I gotta get to bed, or else morning will be more hell then usualy. Enjoy the links.

Links from the way back machine.

So I have about 500 links stored in folders to try to get through and get posted on here. So hopefully I will be doing a bunch of shorter posts to work though some of this.

What if game titles really told the truth about the game you were about to play?

I love scam-baiting. So watching these Nigerian scammers do the Dead Parrot sketch from Monty Python made me laugh.

This website features what happens when grown up artists take kid's drawings of monsters and put some polish on them.

Laughing at a copy pulling a stupid rookie mistake is fun!

Super tips to save you time, money and energy! And Super food tips!

So, like I said, just a short one. More to come. Night night.

60 revolutions per minute this is my regular speed.

Just a couple of quick links for your Sunday enjoyment!

This office wall prank is pretty classic.

Breaking news: Apparently yesterday there was a Robot Revolution in the streets of San Francisco recently, but luckily mankind was able to quell this insurrection before they were able to place themselves in power.

So that last link, got me thinking about my old favorite, Robot Frank. By the looks of it, the official robotfrank website got squatted, but at least he's on myspace. By the looks of it though, GayRobot is more popular.

How Ninja's work.

This is some hardcore MacGyver shit right here.

Links fer lunch

Man. All I could ever do with my kites as a kid is crash them and get them stuck in trees. This is WAY cooler.

Is Robotard the best game ever created? Probably not, because there is alot of competition on godawful games

Every job has its perks, and its fallbacks, this is one of those times for these two unlucky magicians. And here are some more.

This is exactly what I would do if I found out my dorm was attached to a neighboring one by a tunnel.

What happens if one of the

worlds best violinists performs in a subway for change? How often do we pass by real talent in our day to day lives and just ignore it because we are too busy?

Music n' links

So tonight I want to bring you some of the music I have been listening to lately, along with some links.

So here is how this is going to work. I went ahead, and instead of making a ton of links to youtube videos for you to clicky on, I made a play list of the Artists I am going to write about,  you can just click on the play right below here, and enjoy the music as you are perusing the links and such. Hope you enjoy!

 

 

 So the first band you are listening to, unless you are skipping this section of my post, is Gogol Bordello. They are a Gypsy Punk band. Yeah, you heard me. Heavily influenced by punk/rock/funk/and the traditional music of Romania and Eastern European, and Gypsy music. In 2005 the band (Especially the lead singer Eugene Hütz) were featured in the movie "Everything is Illuminated" which is fucking excellent, and where I was first exposed to the band and their music. Their albums so far are:

Voi-La Intruder - 1999
Multi Kontra Culti vs. Irony - 2002
East Infection - 2005
Gypsy Punks: Underdog World Strike - 2005
Super Taranta - 2007

Bonus Gypsy link!

 

The second Artist, and this bit will be short, is Cas Haley. He's a contestant on "America's Got Talent". I really could care less about the show, but the first time I saw a video of him on youtube, I thought to myself "This fucker needs to be taking Bradley Nowell's spot in sublime, and the band needs to start putting out awesome music again."

 

Now the third band, I won't lie about this one. It's a total guilty pleasure band. They are not something I can crank in the car, because I will get laughed at for being a dice chucking Fantasy nerd. But sweet fancy moses is fucking Dragonforce a bad ass band. Take INSANE speed metal, and combine it with crazy fantasy lyrics and the occasional video game noise coming from the smoking guitars, and you cannot go wrong. Supposedly they are going to be featured on Guitar Hero 3, and that would make even the most hard core players fingers bleed. But not as much as the Guitar Hero Dueling banjos. That shit is far more insane. Dragonforce has put out three discs so far:

Valley of the Damned - 2003
Sonic Firestorm - 2004
Inhuman Rampage - 2006

Anyone of those discs will gladly dress up in a unicorn fursuit and rape your favorite band's cds.

 

So that is that. If you liked it, please leave me a comment so I can know if I should do it again and some point. If you didn't leave a comment as well I guess, and then take that comment and shove it directly up your ass. On with the links.

For years now, I have wondered to myself: "Self, what would the peanut's gang look like if they were rendered in Anime?" Well. Question answered..

There are definitely some things that you choose to sacrifice running

Linux as your primary OS, and to be honest, wine just plain sucks running virii. Sorry to say it.. but its the truth.

I am a big fan of Survivorman, Les Stroud is the fucking man. Lately though, an imposter to the throne Bear Grylls, and his show Man vs. Wild has been getting a lot of show on discovery. Well, not only is Les just plain better than Bear, this clip shows that Man vs. Wild has no qualms about flat out lying to you, and Bear is a phoney.

I'm sure Cory has seen most of these when the originally aired, but hopefully there will be a few nuggets in here even for him.

Check out this video of Cyril Raffaelli, who may just be the heir to the Jackie Chan niche. He is still not as ninja as this guy though.

How many spidermen can fit into a Jamba juice? Make your guess then watch this clip from the Late Show.

Man. This video is hard for me to watch. Getting revenge on your roommate that had sex with your girlfriend is completely understandable, but did you have to fucking involve Boba Fett?

I had no idea at all that The Continental was a spoof of an existing show, I just thought it was some wonderful nuggets of Christopher Walken..

This is one bad ass backpack. I don't know if I could ever wear it in public, but that's only because I fear unleashing its awesome upon the world, not at all because I would be embarrassed.

Man, this skittles commercial is both awesome, and kind of sad.

These videos are from awhile ago, but watching these guys prank the dmv is fucking hilarious. I thought it was supposed to be harder for suspicious people to get IDs...

If this is seriously the explanation that I have been waiting for my entire life, I will be kind of disappointed. I have always been intrigued by the moving rocks of the the Racetrack Playa in Death Valley.

This video of a iceberg tipping over is pretty insane. Its easy to forget sometimes how huge these things really are.

My dad used to bowfish, but it was nothing as extreme as this shit. Wtf?

And finally, who doesn't love a little passive aggressiveness. These notes, chronicled for our enjoyment range from the inadvertently funny, the sad, then back to funny.

As always (usually) Your BLECH OF THE DAY!!! with bonus semi-related grossness.

Holy shit.

Usually I don't post the political bullshit here. I leave the world of crazy ass politicians to my main man Cory at SpaceTomatoes, but I had to comment about this.

We need another 9/11?!

Apperantly thats what this fucking retard thinks.
I bet the general public will totally get behind this. Fuck, book me a plane.
Holy Christ.

Regardless how for or against the War you are, 9/11 was bad. No fucking good has come of it. (unless you run a major oil company)

I don't even know how to fully vocalize how completely fucked this article is. Stu Byofsky may quickly become the second most hated man in America (sorry, hell's got a special place reserved for Bush)

So Stu. Good luck in the future, as you see your career and dreams fade away. I was going to write a sentence about how if there was another attack I hope hes in it, but I couldn't bring myself to do it. The people who died that day didn't deserve it, and to say more people deserve to die just so we can fucking hop on the bandwagon with our bullshit fake patriotism and fucking sell more Lee Greenwood cds and flags, thats fucked.

Anyway. Since I've never really done a political rant before, and I feel kinda sick from reading that article, here is this, Sexy Stormtroopers.

Welcome to the new digs.

My old host is shutting its doors. jonsnews / jonslinks / whatever I called it at different points was hosted with Vectorstar.net for 7 years, and I'm sad to be moving.
But its also a chance to change. New name, a little bit of a tweaked design, I have a few other tricks up my sleeves. So hopefully this change will be for the better. Ah well, on to the post.
So right now, jonsnews.vectorstar.net is down. So If your finding this site. I'm not positive how. Once it comes back up, and until it dies for good, I'll put up some redirects. So if your here, bookmark this page and go ahead and get rid of the old address.
On to some content!

Oh god. I can't wait until I get to see "Minesweeper: THE MOVIE"

Wtf‽ Venomous Butterflies‽ This shit needs an interrobang.

I love Old Grandma Hardcore. Who doesn't, I've also got to enjoy the frustration that you can experience in Overlord. Its a hell of a game though. Give them shit granny!

While I still think that "Let Forever Be" is one of the best Checmical Brothers videos, their newest, "The Salmon Dance" is very very good.

Awhile back, I linked the flickr set of a fellow named Goopymart called "teh internets", which was quite awesome. Well now Ape lad has made a similar set, of http error codes as comics.

Tee hee hee, is tiny little ninjas!! Whats worse than tiny ninjas? Tons of ninjas, can there be too many ninjas?

Check out 'The Glitch' a short movie starring the piefucker, Jason Biggs.

WTF!? A man with a tail?!?!!?!?

God. Ironman is going to kick incalculable amounts of ass.. I cannot wait. Oh yeah, and Kevin Smith is still the shit. I can't wait to see his season opener for heroes...

And to wrap up this tiny little post, a first (I think). I give you:

THE MULTIPART BLECH OF THE DAY Now with bonus wiki-power!

So anyways. Welcome to the new site. Its the same as the old site. Night night.

The greatest

*My websites host has had some ftp problems the last couple days, holding this post up, I'm working on another right now, but they got it fixed so here is this"

Zach Galifianakis x Kayne West = Greatest Rap Video EVER!!

Chore Wars, the greatest way to make cleaning/working fun! (I have created a tech support group, if anyone wants to join, let me know!)

Greatest Gaming setup EVER!

Greatest BLECH OF THE DAY.. I'm sorry...

Best Barney video!

Greatest shamisen performance video!

Best cold weather hat of all times! I want this for my birfday this year!!

Best alternative to watching porn at work!

Great zombie survival training video!

Time for a little Oblivion, then its off to sleepy land.

This sucker's electrical, but I need a nuclear reaction to generate the 1.21 jigawatts of electricity I need.

I know you guys remember that line from Back to the Future. I came across it today while looking up some information on IMDB. Long story short, the trivia page mentioned that the writers had hear the Jiggawatt pronunciation at a science conference, and liked the sound of it. According to Wikipedia "A prominent example of the soft G pronunciation is found in the 1985 movie Back to the Future, where gigawatts was pronounced as jigawatts"
So what I propose is this:
Lets bring jigga back. From now on its jiggabytes and jiggahertz. Fuck yeah, my PC has a 3.0 jiggahertz core 2 duo. and 500 jiggabytes of HD space.

On to todays how-to videos. Learn how to make a massive smoke bomb complete with pull ring fuse! Sweet!

I read the "His Dark Materials" trilogy a few years back. Still one of my favorite reads of all times. I honestly cannot wait for the movie. Judging from this trailer, its going to be the tits.

This is seriously the pinnacle of the whole "ghost riding the whip" thing. Seriously. Stop now..

Now its time for some beautiful music to sooth you.

My man Joel sent me this the other day. Its seriously one of the funniest things I have ever seen. My wife and I have watched it probably about 100 times by now. I can't get enough....

Is there anything cooler than a giant tesla coil playing the super mario theme with lightning bolts? Probably, but its seriously fucking cool....

And heres a BLECH OF THE DAY for all you DIY'ers!!!

Have fun kiddies. Lots more to come now that I finally got all my news feeds caught up from vacation..

I'M IN UR X Ying your Z

Super-Size Me (with Whiskey!)

Why are people so fucking retarded? Don't they realize that when they give their kids names like "Urhines Kendall Icy Eight Special K" (Pronounced Yourhighness, and Special K after the drug Ketamine) or "4Real" that they have to walk around with those for the rest of their lives?

I usually try to keep my distance from 'american idol' type crap. But this guy from a recent America's got talent is really good. I would totally buy some of his music.. if.... you know.. I actually bought music..

PEW!!!! its Nintendo Papercraft! New desk toys!!!

This is the very exact reason I fucking hate amusement parks! Fuck that shit..

Oh man.. I have spent WAY too much time looking through this extensive list of Macro's from the 4chan boards.. some fucking awesome shit here.. and oh yes.. Cat Macros..

This post now with bonus lolcats! Is it wrong that I subscribe the rss feed from that site?

About a month ago, Chris from cutewithchris posted a video of him performing the lyrics of "Buy You a Drank Shawty" which I thought was fucking great, since then I have been scrubbing his archives and the guy is actually rather funny. Since then, He's also "covered" a interview with T-pain, and dealt with the comment fallout from his video from the internetidiots.

mmmm Hopsicles!

Ok. So this dress technically has not inside, so if you have it on, are you actually naked? God I love mobius strips, and Klein bottles...

And finally. The (not totally gross) BLECH OF THE DAY

Because not knowing how to cook, is like not knowing how to fuck.

I'm sure you all already knew that Robert Roderiguiz is the fucking man.
Did you know that he includes a "10 Minute Cooking School" on some of his DVDs?
No?
Well. Its fucking awesome. Like everything he does.

How-tos

How-to: Make instant freezing hot ice

How-to: Make Thermite

Wheee. Don't go blow yourselves up kids.

How to irragate your nasal passages.

It does what the title says.

Hello. I'm a Marvel. And I'm a DC.

I saw this quite some time ago, and its still one of my all time favorite fan made starwars videos.

Here is a pretty neat Acapella performance from Imogen Heap. Its neat how she layers her voice.

I allmost allways point my key fob at my head in order to unlock my car from a greater distance. In case your not, watch this video to learn the whys and hows.

God save the queen.

I just read this article over at HardOCP about framerates in Vista Vs. XP. Here's my list of things I love about vista:

• Its freaking huge! Think of all the empty hard drive space you can get used up!
• Just the OS needs a gig of ram! Hooray for upgrades! Two gigs if you plan on running solitaire and word at the same time.
• It’s secure! Who doesn’t like having to click 3 times to allow every single thing they click on to run. Thanks for taking care of all that spare time MS!
• It’s backwards compatible! It will run practically dozens of older applications!
• It will help reduce those ridiculous frame rates I get when I play games!!
• Its pretty!!!!11!!!! Who needs functionality?!
• ReadyBoost! Cause your going to need to squeeze every bit of performance out of your PC if you plan on running Vista.

Fucking A. Seriously.. Some of those games the Vista framerate was HALF as much as the same game in XP.. Go microsoft!

Heres a fun flash shooter game to check out!

This is bad assed. I want one of these for my bedroom!

Super Glitch Bros. What the fuck!?! He's upside down, Oh god now hes standing on thin air?! I allmost like some of the glitched music better. Kinda chip-tone. Read the video description for how he did it.

Howstuffworks: Lightsabers

I thought Harry Potter was a bit familiar.

A softer world, is an awesome webcomic made from old photographs. I really dig it.

Thats right.. Mother fucking Zombies, on a Mother fucking PLANE!!!

Well.. Thats it for me.. time for LOTRO.

A little sumpin sumpin to keep you busy.

Posts may be sparse for a bit. LOTRO is really good..

So heres a little nugget for you. Probably one of my favorite episodes.

Thank god for wikipedia

Starwars Dudes.

ctrl + alt + delicous

mmmmmmmmmmmm

Feed Reader: Google Reader integrates Gmail inline, makes sharing easy

I have been considering switching to more frequent, smaller posts. This new feature in Google reader is tipping me in that direction.

 

 

Sent to you by JonnyRotten via Google Reader:

 

 

Feed Reader: Google Reader integrates Gmail inline, makes sharing easy

via Lifehacker on May 03, 2007

Google Reader just made it a lot easier to share feed items via email with friends who aren't savvy with feed readers. The Email link at the bottom of each item now pops up an inline email form...

 

 

Things you can do from here:

• Visit the original item on Lifehacker
• Subscribe to Lifehacker using Google Reader
• Get started using Google Reader to easily keep up with all all your favorite sites

 

 

Straight up geek porn.

First up clocks:

Ninja Clock!

You will learn to fear sleeping in!!!

Or if you rather wake up gently.

Clocks that warp reality.

This is taking the idea of a time table a little too literal.

 

Next two little bits of drinking tech:

Oh yeah, drinking and fat storage. Two great tastes that taste great together.

Not really tech, but something for the drink geeks among us. Too bad they don't have a shot glass bandolier. I would fill it with these! Fuck. They do have shot glass bandoliers. I know what I want for my birthday. Oh yeah, and a bottle of this, and abottle of this. YARR!

 

Kinda cool and useful tech:

USB key holder. I would totally keep my usb stick on my keys if I had one of these.

Hell yes. Fucking transformer earphones!!! All I need is a real life Soundwave and I am fucking Good to Go.

 

WTF? Tech:

The Mouse mouse.

The tampon taser gun!

Electric bath duck.

Remote control USB BBgun.

In case you haven't heard.

It seems that there is a bit of a user revolt going on at digg.com, starting last night. It seems that digg started censoring posts that contained the leaked hd-dvd encryption key in them. Well. The user's are not taking that lightly. It seems like maybe the Dark Tipper hasn't sold out to the man. Here is why making the key open is a good thing.

Happy Birthday Spam!

Oh hell yeah. Go out and make a penis enlargement cake. Its motherfuckin spams birthday! WOOOOHOOOO

I think this may be the coolest fucking lego thing I have EVER seen in my life.

Check it out. Two awesome games:

Online MMO Risk! Fuck yeah!

New tower defense game! Protect the server!  I think this is one of the harder ones I have played.

 

Ok.. 30 minutes later.. god that games addictive.

Neatorama had a cool article up about 30 strange animal mating habits. Entertaining read. I'm glad I'm not a bee.. That's all I'm sayin. Here's a quote:

"Actually, "court" may be too strong a word: the male giraffe basically follows her around until she gives in and lets him have her!"

Sounds like marriage...

Oh, and Cory, It mentions the dolphins prehensile penis...

Here are 12 quick and easy steps to being a computer security idiot.

This is a great article about the history of batmans vehicles.

It's art! No! it's a puzzle! It's both!

Check out this guys badassed driving skills.

Funny Ebay feedback!

Wham! Biff! Ooof! Some sweet fighting skills when this guy takes on 5 attackers. He's got nothing on these kung fu masters though.

So.. Why exactly are these places blurred out in google maps?

Have you ever wondered what the exactly opposite of absolute zero is?

How dating my ex was like playing DOOM II on nightmare mode. In the vein of the ever classic Things my girlfrienda nd I have argued about.

Time for me to get my ass to beddybye land. Have fun with those links kids. And if your not fucking watching Heroes, than WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU?! Sweet god just when I didn't think it could get any better, it does.. by leaps and bounds.

Oh

I allmost forgot.

Your BLECH OF THE DAY. Be sure to watch the videos near the end.

It's only teenage wasteland.

Fuck flying cars. I want one of these bitches.

Check out these ninja sushi skills.

Sweet ass steampunk guitar.

Yet another funny This Old House Home inspection nightmare.

It's the internet dress me up Mr. T

I don't know if this is fake or not. But its still kinda funny/creepy. Just don't tell Ryan.

King of the cul-de-sac!

Here's a bit of trend spotting for you. I predict that ASL (American sign language) intrepretations of rap songs are going to be a upcoming internet meme. Cause if the quality on that video was better, I would label that shit as totally fly. Look, you can do it to other generes too, like rock, oldies, 80's greats, top forty, but sadly, not nü metal. It makes that shit gayer. And not this.

What you know about math? Punk!

If you've never seen Chacarron before, you need to watch this video.

Now this is the part of the post where I link to good music that doesn't suck:

I have loved Tenacious D since their show way back in the day on HBO (I think it was HBO). They are still kicking ass. FWIW this is one of my favorite episodes. And here is a YouTube playlist with all the episodes.

Here's a video of the Blue Man Group performing "Baba O'Riley" by The Who

Queen. Live at Wembley Stadium. Fucking awesome.

This is one of my all time favorite videos.

This is where I end the part of the post where I link to good music that doesn't suck. Until next time.

This tiger has HUGE BALLS.

And here it is. the BLECH OF THE DAY!!!

Thats it for now. More to come. Stay tuned.

A few of my favorite lines from the Super Hard Super Mario Bros video

Fuck! Fuck! This is... fucking worse than anything that has ever happened! This is horse cock in tiny mouth!

fucking koopa I can't believe it who makes these invisible blocks

Thank you Bullet Bill for helping me shuffle off this mortal coil.

I hate everything that has ever existed, I hate the whole world *finally makes jump* I love everthing! LALALA

Koopa... you are a cocksuckah

This is a nightmare, This is fucking worse than a RL Stein book.

Thank goodness I have W-Bluesky lives.

God is on my site, not your side Bowser.

You just have to watch it for the rest of them.

A little this, A little that.

One of the first commandments of office work is "Thou shalt not invoke the nerd rage"

Oooooo two great tastes combined. The mythbusters ask the Ask a Ninja Ninja. Part of a web special for an upcoming Ninja Mythbusters special.Over time the Ninja has slowly grown on me.

What would you do with 86 old PCs? Two bonus oblivion Domino videos for you..

ROFLMAO (a wow update of mah-na-na na)

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

Man, this is a harsh prank. One comedian gets sets up his buddy for the next set by getting the entire audience to not laugh at all. Its allmost painful to watch.

Cosplay gone wrong.

So someone made a allmost impossible mod for the SMB for the NES. I mean, its fucking CRAZY HARD. So then some crazy guy posts a video of him playing it, and its possibly one of the funnier things I have seen in quite awhile.

This page cannot be fucking displayed!

Fun with mirrored video

Its Toroboto! The Robot that tortures people!

Metroid Vs Halo = Haloid.

Part of me wants to think Gelli Baff is awesome. The other part is aware that bathing in slime is gross.

Your BLECH OF THE DAY

You broke up with me? I'm gonna fuck your mom!

Bed time for me kids. Enjoy the links.

Things I like.

I like Regina Spektor. She has a nice voice and her music is so stripped down that listening to it to me is like listening to a pure distillation of wonderful. And as a bonus, shes not too rough on the eyes.

I like Steampunk. I like anachronistic things like this. Steampunk is cool.

Just two things I wanted to share.

Two men enter the shitty mixtape arena, one exits having to carry the winners shitty mixtape throughout NYC blaring on a boombox.

Battle of the Urban Ninjas.

Oh god. U2 is going to help bring spiderman to broadway.. Should I just shoot myself now?

In case you've never had the chance to play with supercooled water, here are a couple cool videos. You can do it with beer too. Now thats good science.! (Now with bonus alcohol science tricks)

Previously I mentioned how much the new NIN cd rocks my ass. But have you been checking out the ARG that goes along with it? If not, its definatly good.

Holy shit thats alot of water!

How many licks does it take to get to the center of the football sized candy? Watch and see!

Robert Goulet is a motherfucker.

Roy Rules! Man, Andy Samburg is definatly one of the best things on SNL now.

Heres a video of some funny magic tricks.

Well. Thats it for now.. More later.

WTF FTW

Holy shit.

This weekend, The Simpsons is 20 years old.. that blows my fucking mind.

So. What the fuck is this guy doing? I stumbled across some of his shit on youtube, and its.. crazy..

Who doesn't want to see lots of pictures of cats doing invisible stuff? I know it sounds weird, but its way funny.

Man, how many fucking kinds of awesome is this video for Knights of Cydonia by Muse? Its like 6 minutes of kungfu/Western/SciFi eyegasm.

A musical response to Farenheit 911.

Star wars Mah-nah-nah-nah.

Now here is an invention that mankind has needed for years. A Volumetric Penile Measure Device. Remember kids, its not whos is bigger, or longer, but whos takes up the largest volume!

Beardyman drops some science.

Man. This is a beautiful 3 minute documentary about High Voltage Cable Inspection. Definatly worth a watch.

Watch a SWAT training where they use just a little too much explosive to breach a door.

What happens when the SomethingAwful goons make porn safe for work? Comic Genius.

Man. This game is really addictive. Its yet another tower defense game, but I really like some of the things they are doing different in this one.

This pic of Iron Man in the grey suit is FUCKING BAD ASSED.

Powered by Bleezer

ugh

Why do things like this allways happen in April?

Wikipedia seems to be the place to go right now for up to the minute details.

Powered by Bleezer

Sweet!

Check out this pic of Heath Ledger as Joker for the upcoming Batman Movie. 2008 cannot get here fast enough.

Links for the proletariat

Desktopography is some high end shiney for your desktop wallpaper.

Overlord and Razorwire are the two most l33t haxx0rs in the world. Watch their adventures. When I saw the first video I thought that it would be perfect for acceptable.tv. And guess what, now its on it!

Its still not as good as Gemberling or Sockbaby! Go tell your alien brothers that Ronnie Cordova says their GAY! I don't know why, but I still think that Sockbaby is one of my all time favorite things on the internet..

I think some of my very first links on this site were to X-Entertainment, and they've consistantly cranked out quality content on that site for quite some time. So check out this artice about Dead Sodas.

I know the description of a turn based fighting game doesn't really sound the most fun, but I tell you what, the first time you rip your opponents arms off, and uppercut his head off you'll be addicted.

Stupid lusers.

This game is a pretty good take on the traditional Arkanoid/Breakout mold.

A scientist is going to see if its possible to live underwater using algea as both a source of food and oxygen.

This is a really funny use of the Mento and Coke trick.

Read some of the emails in the Inbox of Nardo Pace, the Empires worst engineer

Is Laz-D the greatest rapper ever? Definatly not, but its definate that Jelly Donut is the best freestyler in the entire world!!!More JellyD here.

And your BLECH OF THE DAY

Happy Easter!

Enjoy your snacks!

Just remember is not all about the candy.

P.S. I love me some Tom Waits. I wonder what his take on the whole debacle is..

Various youtubery

Ok. So I have a ton of video links, and want to get them the fuck out of the way so I can get to the good stuff. So here we go, get your clicking fingers ready.

White chicks & Gang signs.

And by the same guy Time 4 Bed

Weird. Its a song sung in Simlish, along with a sims video for it.Of if you would like, some Depeche Mode in simlish.

Here is a video, hour by hour of a growth of a beard.. Kinda neat.

This is a pretty interesting way to play a guitar.

WTF is this?

Here is a video of a homeless guy bringing down the house at the Apollo, and here is a short documentary about him. Its nice to see someone commit themselves so fully to something they love to do, and not do it for the money. I'll tell you what, if this fucker was on Americal Idol I would watch that shit..

This is a pretty amazing video (actually a few pictures put to a song) of sand floating on top of the ocean, and a new island being born.

I asked my wife if I could get one of these, she totally shot me down.

You have gotta watch this video of these four japanese guys doing the robot... awesome..

This seems like a good enough reason not to fuck with the Policia is Spain.

Its nice to see some people fucking with those Nigerian scamming spam bastards. Good stuff..

Starwars Mah-nah-nah-nah.

And to wrap it up. This has to be one of my favorite things I have seen in a long time. I would love to see this picked up by Cartoon Network and made into a full serials! Its Mathmatical!

P.S. The new NIN cd is going to be awesome. Listen to it on their site.

link link linky link

Purely in the interests of science, I have replaced the word "wand" with "wang" in the first Harry Potter Book

Is this what video games are like if your on some massive drugs?

If you liked the Geek Squad manuals that were leaked last week, here are 6 more for you! Wheee.

This bed looks pretty interesting, Pretty wiked design.

Man. This game is really addictive. Its like a combination of Jenga, Bridge Builder, and Pickup Sticks...

Ever want to take your geek rage out by shooting the hell out of a LCD monitor? This is what it would look like!

Holy shit.. you have got to watch this video of some fucking INSANE origami! its crazy..

Get your fill of disgusting food at this site. Mmmm Ambergris....(I have allways had a weird obsession with ambergris, and especially with finding a large chunk of it and selling it for tons of money. I mean god damn, shits like 10 bucks a gram. Thats crack prices!)

The "This Old House" website has some funny articles up about retarded home design. Good stuff.

Every day this guy draws a new monster and posts it on his website. I love his art style, and the videos of him creating the monsters are really quite impressive.

Imagine if the characters off of your cereal boxes had some crazy adventures, thats what this comic is all about..

A ninja pays half my rent.

What happens if a watermain breaks on your street in the winter? This!

Create or Destroy, its your choice in BlockLand the only online LEGO inspired game.

Check out this use for your old Cd spindles.

Need a reason why you SHOULD pirate your movies?

Louis CK and the tale of the saddest handjob ever!

Man.. Sometimes science is just fucking weird.. WTF???

WHAT THE EVERLOVING FUCK?!

What What? In the butt!

Check out this video of three guys playing one guitar.

This kid got sent home from school because he dressed up like a pirate, and he's a pastafarian.

All right. I feel a little better, emptying out some of my saved up links. Go forth and click away!

The best part of wakin up, is hot links in your cup..

I'm in the process of finishing watching the "vengeance" trilogy by Chan-wook Park. I would have to say out of three "Oldboy" so far has been my favorite, I am just finishing "My Lady Vengeance", and "Sympathy for Mr. Vengeance" was pretty badass. His directing style is quite stunning, and all three movies are visual treats. I loved the one-take fight scene in Oldboy, probably one of my favorite fight scenes of all time.

On to the linkies!

Wow.. talk about old school internet greatness. All your base belong to Calvin and Hobbes.

Is Batman the greatest ninja of all time? He's definatly in the top ten according to this list.

Slashdot has a pretty interesting post about bugs as features in programs. Interesting read for the comments.

Jim Halpert is Dead?!?!?!!? If your not watching The Office, do yourself a favor and go get the first two seasons and catch the fuck up. Also, if you haven't seen the I.T. Crowd yet, get the fuck to it! And while I'm speaking on TV stuff.. get "The Mighty Boosh" as well.. Genius stuff!!!!

What should I do with 300 porn DVDs? Questions like that are the reason I love ask.metafilter. Also, Adam Savage posts there occasionaly, which is kinda cool.

This is some horrible live action Street Fighter goodness..

Allthough I'm not a huge fan of their name change from dailyWTF, to worse than failure, the content is still as gooas as ever, so check out this wonderful error message.

Fucking MC ROVE in the hizzouse!!! The rappin resident! Colin Mochrie on the beatbox!Now with bonus old school linkage!!!!! Its Princess Leia the yodel of life!!! ahh the headly innocent days of the internet, when the sky was the limit.. now its all mashups and torrents and blah blah blah. Oh god.. I think I may be becoming a internet geezer. Doomed to sit on my porch in a rocking chair mumbling about animutations, and the day we were set up the bomb..

Want to fix computers the GeekSquad way? Then check out their leaked manuals.

Ok.. this is some crazy sci-fi future shit right here.. a fucking deep fat frier/gold fish tank

Here is a great clip from an excellent British show called "Spaced", its by the guy behind Shaun of the Dead..

Check out this crazy flash life sized whale!

I've never heard of this band, but the songs pretty good, and the video is very cool. Filmed entirely in reverse for some cool effects.

A conversation at the Grownup Table, as imagined at the Kids table.

Did you know that the Super Mario Brothers song has actual lyrics? Me either!

Dear video game industry, please note, this is how you sell video games. LOTS AND LOTS of video games.

Ok. get ready for two crazy ass videos, Human Slingshot and Robot Ride.

Man these are some very pretty desktop backgrounds.

Ok.. I think that should keep you crazy kids busy for awhile. But let us not forget our BLECH OF THE DAY!!!!

Can we link it? YEAH!

A student has been suspended from school in America for coming to class dressed as a pirate.

I really like this guys steampunk re-imagining of Star Wars. Its quite cool.

Samurai's sliceing shit in really slow motion.

Holy shit, This is maybe the geekiest thing I have seen in days.

This is is by far the nerdiest wallet I have ever seen. I think I may make one this weekend.

And to wrap it up. Two fucking WHACKED out videos. One annnnnd TWO

Oh yeah. Your BLECH OF THE DAY

bleep doop bleblebe beep

Hmm I read some news sites this morning, and joystiq has a pretty decent article about how "dwarf fortress" is the future of gaming. Man.. If there was a tight gui for it, it would rock even more ass..

I think one of the things I love most about it, is the different game modes, and how they interact with the persistant world. If you play a few successful games of Fortress mode, and build some awesome dwarf civilistaions that create some epic weapons, later you can play adventure mode and discover the ruins of your old civs and plunder the loot you created before. Everything in this world functions and has names. Everthing is also generated when you first run the world generator. Its a awesome game if you get into it..

So, on to subject number 2 for todays post. Faith.

I have faith. I don't talk about it much, unless asked. I don't feel its my right to judge others based on their faith, or any other factors. But HOLY SWEET FANCY MOSES! How can some people of faith be so stupid?!?!?!! I watch these two videos, notice their complete lack of a grasp on science and reality, and then I want a peanut butter and bannana sammich. Ok. I guess in the second video maybe he is unwittingly touching on some quantum physics, because I guess that while the lid is on the jar, the peanut butter could be in multiple states (there/not there/a teeming civilization).

If you've ever played any of the "grow" games (Grow RPG being the best IMHO) then you may enjoy this.

Haha the Ninja from 'Ask a Ninja' interviews Will Farrell and Jon Heder from Blades of Glory

Ever wonder what would happen if you throw a big bowl of dry ice into a hotel swimming pool?! Pure awesome.

Its been a hard days night of the living dead!

This is one of my favorite skits from UCB..

Exploding Cds!

I think I am going to make this site a daily visit "Does Today Suck?"

People say retarded shit every day, why should their court visits be any different?

1';JKLIOP

Man.. I would allways get in trouble in school for writting smart ass answers on my tests.. SOme of these are great!

B.00..0.0..// K KL KJ

. .0

00H

G 0

]\0G ./]\

LECH OF THE DAY! 0

00000000000000000000

7

My daughter and niece just typed that last bit.. I'll leave it in there, just cause..

Sweet god. I've allways despised Alex Albrecht. This clip has made it all worth while.

Could the Onion be coming out with some compitition for the Daily show?

Hmmmm did this guy travel into the future and meet the future version of himself? His cameraphone says yes..

And to wrap it up, there are some real jems in B3ta's Bumper Book of Sick Jokes.

Oh it would've been, could've been worse than you would ever know.

I'm really digging the new Modest Mouse cd. Its pretty bad-assed. I've been a fan of theirs since like 2000 and its great to see them getting some recognition. If you haven't seen it yet, check out their new video for Dashboard, its fishtastic.

Pimps up, Ho's down, Gmod is in da club!

See.. Ideas like this are what make our society great. "Hey Honey, Tonight I need you to taser me while I'm shotgunning a beer! Yeah yeah, I know it sounds crazy, but its going to be GREAT!!"Its how great things are born.

I;m sure you've all seen the exploding whale video. If not, you should go back through the packet you got when you first used the internet. I know its in there.. Well anyway, I had no idea that they tended to blow up by themselves.. GROSS!

God I love me some 'This American Life'. I'm excited for the upcoming Showtime show of it. Also I'm pumped that they are finally offering free MP3 downloads, and not just streaming realaudio versions of the show.

So yeah.. Short one today.. Maybe tommorow I will get to pick through my "bag o' links" some more.

Get ready to have your tiny little minds blowen.

Hooray! I have finally found a offline blogging software in ubuntu that I really like. Bleezer is pretty sweet! If your a linux user and blog, then definatly check it out. It works great in windows and mac Os too (cause its java based) so feel free to check it out if you haven't switched yet.

In a few moments I am going to link to you, what I feel may be one of the most in depth and insane games I've ever played. I've put a huge amount of hours into it, and still have barely scratched the surface. It's one of those games that the first time you play it, you'll probably dismiss it.. You'll download(4.8megs and its amazing) and play it for about 5 minutes, and then exit.. But then an hour later you'll get that nagging feeling in a dark recess of your mind. Maybe it was me.. Maybe I need to give it another chance.. And if you do, you'll discover that your made some fool mistake, read some more of the help files, or check out the wiki and plunge back into it.. And quite honestly, you'll think of games in a different way. It's seriously that good.. Its like watching a whole world unfurl in front of you, and your in control. Some people will be put off by the "graphics" but get over it.. If you do, you will be changed.. I can't say it enough, the more I play this game, the more I fall in love with my little dwarfs..The slogan of the game is "Losing is Fun!" and its true with this game.. It is amazing to watch the world grow over each successive play.

Ok.. So onto the "meat" of the post.

TONIGHT! WE DINE IN HECK!!! a Family Friendly version of 300

This is how the truely hardcore eat their pancakes!

Girls costume warehouse. We got a lot of fuggin costumes here!

I love me some Mc Chris. Check out his take on Kingdom Hearts 2 Vs Resident Evil 4

Is it possible that Linux MCE could be better than Windows MCE? Check out this video for a side by side comparison.

Mmmm Yes.. I'd like a 'Big Bowl bow of immerses from fish head' and a 'Fragrant bone in garlic in strange flavor" Please..

Sometimes you need to look back and ask yourself, was dyeing my hair worth it swelling up to giant football size?

This is probably one of the coolest pieces of WOW fan art ever.. I love this pic.

This is why you're not allowed to play with my action figures!

I've been considering learning the art of 'wet shaving' for awhile now.. maybe I should..

I know I can't be the only one who has wanted to see what would happen if you microwave a furby...

Man.. I think I posted this awhile back, but i can't get enough of watching a windows install get throughly raped by spyware..

I love this french ad for "March of the Penguins" Its genius!

This SOOOOO badly needs to be made into a series on cartoon network's adult swim..

Well.. Thats it for now.. till next time kiddies!

Technorati: Games Ubuntu

Call me a traitor

Well... I switched a couple weeks ago. Both at work and at home. I'm running Ubuntu full time at home, and duel booting at work, only when I need to do something with Infopath.

Overall I have to say I am really impressed where ubuntu has brought the linux desktop experience. My wife adopted it without a problem. She's using it exactly to the level she was using windows before. I would allmost feel comfortable switching my mom. Its seriously that good now.

With the package mangers, installing new programs is a breeze. Pretty much everything just worked on both of my installations. The only real tweaking I had to do was at work, getting my dual monitors working the way I wanted them..

But.. enough about that.. On with the links!

If you're a security minded person, feel free to follow the NSA's guide to locking down your PC.

Next time your having a shit day, pop open these pictures and you'll feel better..

Man.. What would I do without crazy ass Japanese TV shows? Watch it till the end to see the Natto Bomb!!

Man.. This looks like the most delicious swarm ever!

Haha. This clip of people who have no idea how to handle a rifle shoot a really high caliber gun is quite funny!

This is the same method I use to cook my steaks. Watch this video for the key to making a perfect steak..

Well.. My supper is done.. so I guess thats it for now.. I gotta get through all the links I got sitting here waiting to post.. so stay tuned for more.

powered by performancing firefox

Fuck the xbox 360

Watch this video and see why.

Turn around, bright eyes...

I can't even count how many levels of crazy this shit is.. so watch it and enjoy.

 

Check out this bad assed TV Guide thingy.

 

Jonathan Coulton, the genius behind "Code Monkey" and "Re: Your Brains." (You can hear the songs and more, or even purchase some of his awesome music on his site) did a cover of Sir Mix-a-lots classic "Baby Got Back". Now someone has taken that and sync'd it with the original video. Its cool because all of his stuff is released under the Creative Commons liscense, which means that cool little projects can use it to make new content.

 

Man.. Imagine looking at your town on google maps and seeing this shit overhead!

 

NWA's Fuck the Police, censored in real time.. Funny shit..

 

What if we took a Harry Potter book and replaced every instance of "wand" with "wang""

 

Oh god.. Its Rap-Cat. Yeah Boyeeeeeeee

 

I know you've all been waiting to see what a Japanese Bruce Willis would look like.. So here you go!

 

Everyone loves to see people getting the sweet fancy moses scared out of them.. So, enjoy!

 

Ugh.. well time for magic beddy by land.. more tommorow.

All that...

 

And a bag of chips!

 

I'm a fan of "Tower Defense" games, heres a pretty sweet one where you can create a maze out of them.

 

I thinkjust about anyone that knows me, knows my love for Non-newtonian fluidss. So here are some sweet videos of them.

 

Henry Rollins: A Love Letter To Ann Coulter

 

Here's another bad assed time wasting game. Navigate a field, and then avoid versions of yourself going back in time.. Its a weird game that I found pretty addicting for awhile.

Damn you internets!!11one!!

I wasn't going to post tonight. I've been sick the last two days, and I had to catch up on Lost and Jericho tonight... but.. This link is just too damn important for everyone to see.

What what?

Ok.. fuck it.. I'm here.. may as well purge a few links out of my "to post" folder.

Ghost riding the whip.

THE PRISONERS OF YOUTUBE!!! such a dramatic name for a pretty decent article about the meme's we know and love.

FEZ's!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I'm Paco. This is my comic about my adventures.

and.... wait for it.... wait for it... .wait..... Your BLECH OF THE DAY

Links Especially 4 U

Someone from work quit today, and his last email was hilarious.

Basic Instructions. Your all inclusive guide to life well lived.

Nanaca Crash. I don't know what the fuck this is, but I can't stop playing it! My current best is 2009.56m. And they were right. If I liked that game, I also loved Pio Pio!

Here's another great David Sedaris piece from the New Yorker.

This would seriously suck. I would have pissed my pants.

Valentine for Perfect Strangers. I don't even think my brain has words to describe this.. Its pretty fucking.. I dunno.. Some of the youtube responses are great too.. I think one more link, and this becomes a certified Balki-Bonanza. So lets DO IT!

Here are some funny graphs. Enjoy!

Man.. This tech demo from lucas arts is pretty sweet ass..

I can't remember if I posted this before, but check out this awesome lego mindstorms automated car factory!

Oh god.. I allmost forgot. Your BLECH OF THE DAY

Nobel invented dynamite. I won't accept his blood money.

I've been catching up on House MD lately, and I have to say it's quite enjoyable.

Holy shit! I want a cyclone of flame!!

I wish they made regular glasses frames like these!!!

I guess it makes sense.. What would you do if you found a alien? Pour some fucking wimpy sauce on that bitch and toss it on a bun!

Leave it to the Japanese to come up with a horror movie about hair extensions.

Sweep the leg Johnny! It is pretty cool that they got alot of the guys back together from the original movie to make this video.

And to be the creamy whipped topping on this yummy post. Your BLECH OF THE DAY

And I absorb back in. The words right through my skin, They sit there festering inside my bowels.

I've been listening to alot of Regina Spektor lately. Really good stuff..

Why hasn't every fucking animal on the planet learned not to fuck with porcupines yet?

Cooking up some beatbox

Great White Sharks feeding on a whale carcass

These long exposure pictures of old arcade games are really quite beautiful.

Here kitty kitty kitty. And one of my old favorites, Lime Cat is not amused!


Well... time to scoot to work.. more later kiddo.

Postin in the boys room

What I learned from TMNT.

I think I posted some youtube clips of "Let's Paint TV (and Exercise and Cook Too)" but goddammit for some reason I find it insanely motivational every time I watch it.

I've been a David Sedaris fan for quite awhile. Here's a clip on youtube of him reading one of his essays on David Letterman.

This chair is crazy! I want one!!

Go US Immigration! Rip those anal stitches out!!

Web 2.0 ... The Machine is Us/ing Us This video is very very cool. Its a well done example of how the web is changing us, and the written word.

Warning

I do not think I am doing that BLECH OF THE DAY I posted in that last post enough justice.
DO NOT CLICK ON IT. It cannot be unwatched. I watched about 5 seconds and had to stop. God damn.
But really.. You've been warned..

Got things fixed finally

Hurra!

Posting can begin again.. I accidently trashed my new design in the process of fixing things.. So I just grabbed a default template that I'll work on tweaking later.


213 Things Skippy Can't do in the US Military

Cats that look like Hitler

I've been playing this game for a few months now on and off. Its a pretty cool idea, a turn based fighter.

Oh shit, the new Star Wars Gansta Rap is even better then the old one!

I'm going to warn you right now. This is by far the most disgusting BLECH OF THE DAY I have EVER EVER EVAR POSTED!!!!111one!!!